Look what (mess) God Made!

10 Jul

FOUND:

Look what God made! (VHS)

kids bible video

Yet another Wiser Family Video find, and it’s just as bad. Bible stories told with cutsey animation and a rhyming voiceover. They never..stop…rhyming!

The Wiser Family consists of Grandma and Grandpa and a bunch of kids. We never learn what happened to the parents.

In this video we learn how human kind was created, and how good God is.  We also learn that Adam doesn’t have nipples or a belly button.  Here’s the recap:

God creates the world, humans and animals. Humans, who have no knowledge, get blamed for Satan tricking them and banished. They have two boys, one of which kills the other and is cursed. God creates rain to kill every man, woman and child, but spares Noah’s family and a small group of animals. Oh and rainbows get invented.

God, you’re not very good at this God business are you?

Introducing the Wiser Family

Adam and Eve, and how we didn’t come from Monkeys

Adam gets a Wife to love and enjoy, hell ya!

Eve gets a Nipple-less Man to love and serve, wait what?!

Noah, a dog, a donkey, a sheep, a pig and a chicken

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